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Neon Nights Located along Swallow Street in the heart of the West End, The Cuckoo Club has seen a number of big-name a-listers pass through its doors since opening, including Brandon Flowers, Natalie Portman, Orlando Bloom and Lindsay Lohan - all of whom come to party away from the prying eyes of the press. Decked out in deep purples and blacks, The Cuckoo Club has an air of rock chic about it, with glossy furnishings, sumptuous leather seating, velvet drapes and a LED-studded ceiling. The bar is long and well-stocked, with gorgeous cocktails being served up by gorgeous mixologists. The only negative thing we would say is that there is a £30 minimum card spend, which is ridiculous in this financial climate; after telling the barman that we weren't prepared to buy another drink that we didn't want just to round it up, he put the card through. Naturally, the club attracts a crowd of big-spending business executives and their Sloane Ranger-style girlfriends, but the vibe is surprisingly unpretentious. The clientele is draped in designer finery, yes, but its desire to party far outweights its desire to pose. Upstairs, on the ground floor, is a suitably stylish restaurant, headed up by head chef Rupert Blease. The menu is a concise list of Modern European dishes, with main courses such as pan-fried Diver scallops, chargrilled aged beef and roasted Cornish monkfish. As you'd expect, it's another glamorous affair, perfect for entertaining work clients or simply catching up with the girls Sex and the City-style. Spread over 5,000-square-feet and offering membership only to those who truly deserve it (no non-celebrity twits allowed here), The Cuckoo Club is deserving of its exclusive reputation. While it could certainly tighten up its treatment of the press somewhat (!), we do appreciate its coolness. Bungalow 8 better watch its back. www.thecuckooclub.com / Images: The Cuckoo Club 
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